I
recently read a blog in which a man shared how to treat your wife. It’s gone viral. The interesting thing? He is divorced. Several days later I read a blog by a woman
in response on how to treat your husband.
The interesting thing? The woman is
on her third marriage.
I
believe we can learn plenty from our mistakes, but why is it we get our advice
from people who can’t seem to stay in a relationship instead of asking a couple
who is about ready to celebrate their 35th, or better yet, 55th
wedding anniversary? Any Christ-follower
knows that we grow through down times, sad times, rebellious times, if we only
let God teach us. But the sad thing is
this—why do we not seek out and listen to those who did it right the first
time?
Do you
want a truly great marriage? If so, stop
asking advice from those who are in stagnant, unfulfilling relationships or
those who claim to have the answer now that they’ve failed. Instead, find a couple who has the kind of
marriage you’d like to have…then ask them
how to have a great marriage. They’re
usually not the ones who say a lot about it, because they’re not complaining
about their wife. They’re not telling
you about what a bum their husband is. Instead,
you notice them holding hands at church.
You see him leave work a little early so he can get home and help her
with the kids. They may be quietly
sitting over coffee reading the paper or surrounded by their grandkids at the
park.
All
marriages have their ups and downs; if someone says they don’t, they are either
lying or oblivious! But successful
couples learn how to work through issues and come out stronger and better on
the other side. That’s what we need to
hear! We need to ask those who have
successfully maneuvered through this thing called marriage, raised children,
worked a job, had illnesses, had disagreements and fights, and are still living
“happily ever after.” That’s who I want
to talk to, ask questions of, get answers from, see modeled before me. Why do we always seek out those who failed and
now say they have the answer?
There is
a generation of couples who were highly successful. They’re celebrating their 60th
anniversaries, not their 6 month-iversary and we need to glean all the wisdom we
can from them before it’s too late!
We will
be sharing golden nuggets from couples who have been married 30 years or more
on our Facebook page over the next few months.
Watch for it!
